I know some families out there have seamless, flawless times with their families. Some just joke around; Others avoid any problems and skim over the top. We are not like that.
All four of us look forward to getting together - and are always glad that we did. We have priceless times together. Just this year, we went to a ball game, took a ride on the Mississippi, played scrabble, ate at a fun Italian restaurant...and enjoyed a great Thanksgiving dinner together (if I do say so myself).
But in our family, each of us four shows up with their issues and they usually surface somewhere along the way. We get irritated, controlling, a bit grumpy..and we are a family that gets a bit intense as well. We do deal with our momentary flare ups, take a little break if we need to, and once again come together for some good laughs and quality time together.
Sometimes I think we should be like other families..
And I often say that I am glad that we are not.
We were so thankful this year that Katie's biopsy was benign - and that Daniel grew a beard (turned out to be an afterthought of his Boundary Waters' trip with good friends). We aren't too happy that Tom is still working for work, but are thankful that Tom and I have weathered many joys and sorrows through the years - and will look forward to an uncertain future together. We know may people can't do that. We also have our fluffy little dog Sasha to keep us perked up and delighted.
So all in all, I will conclude as my new favorite author, Alexander McCall Smith, did (in the latest book I just finished):"But one had to be careful, (she) reminded herself: One should not ask for too many things in this life, especially when one already had so much."
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Saturday, April 16, 2011
What I Learned Through My Seminar
Recently, I led two seminars on "Discovering the Song Written in Your Heart" in Chilton, Wisconsin at the annual Ladies' Breakaway. Speaking there is always a highlight of the year for me. I try to do it on what is close to my heart that particular year.
The book, The Grand Weaver by Ravi Zacharias, given to me by my friend and mentor Kay Dickey, was pivotal in helping Tom and me and in inspiring this message. He is an outstanding communicator and clearly helps people see how God is weaving every intricate part of their lives into a beautiful tapestry. Accepting your DNA, circumstances, gifts abilities and even limitations and difficulties and yielding them to our awesome Creator is the starting and restarting point of developing into these special masterpieces. The book helped us see how Tom has special aptitudes, personality traits and gifting to do chaplaincy work. I felt he was a great shepherd/pastor too, but circumstances have seemed to direct us this way. I once again saw how my life is being spun in a special way (in more ways than one:)) and that I continue to love to teach and encourage.
Tapestry - picture one. Picture two: a daisy. All the gifting, talents, abilities, passions..can be used in many special ways to express ourselves and help others. They can be used directly and indirectly to "surround" Christ, who has given or bestowed us with them. When I moved here, I chose to find places to use what I believe mine are. Encouragement at the food pantry, sometimes prayer with the clients if they want it and and teaching at a little after school Bible club were my first opportunities. I had success using the Weight Watchers' program and eventually was retrained as a leader and receptionist. It helps with the bills and once again, I do the things I enjoy - helping others succeed as well and being up in front as a coach. I have also been able to meet with a couple of younger girls at my church a couple of times and we just formed a small ladies' Bible study group. Expressing myself through these blogs, thanks to the persistence of our daughter Katie, has also been a song in my heart that I can now voice.
Bouquet of Praise - picture 3. Corrie Ten Boom, known as a survivor of Nazi concentration camps where she witnessed her sister being killed, used to speak on forgiveness all around the world. She actually met the man who had murdered her sister. His life had changed and he was truly sorry and she was able to greet him. She would go home after her speeches, get on her knees and offer a bouquet of praise in thanks to the Lord. I do praise God for opportunities that are opened to me - even that I am trusted with a key to the Weight Watchers' meeting places:). In the Bible, we are called the "aroma of Christ" as well. That is what I want my life to be! I am stressed as I sometimes have to pull up by boot straps in new situations and find where I fit. When I choose to find those places, I am blessed.
The book, The Grand Weaver by Ravi Zacharias, given to me by my friend and mentor Kay Dickey, was pivotal in helping Tom and me and in inspiring this message. He is an outstanding communicator and clearly helps people see how God is weaving every intricate part of their lives into a beautiful tapestry. Accepting your DNA, circumstances, gifts abilities and even limitations and difficulties and yielding them to our awesome Creator is the starting and restarting point of developing into these special masterpieces. The book helped us see how Tom has special aptitudes, personality traits and gifting to do chaplaincy work. I felt he was a great shepherd/pastor too, but circumstances have seemed to direct us this way. I once again saw how my life is being spun in a special way (in more ways than one:)) and that I continue to love to teach and encourage.
Tapestry - picture one. Picture two: a daisy. All the gifting, talents, abilities, passions..can be used in many special ways to express ourselves and help others. They can be used directly and indirectly to "surround" Christ, who has given or bestowed us with them. When I moved here, I chose to find places to use what I believe mine are. Encouragement at the food pantry, sometimes prayer with the clients if they want it and and teaching at a little after school Bible club were my first opportunities. I had success using the Weight Watchers' program and eventually was retrained as a leader and receptionist. It helps with the bills and once again, I do the things I enjoy - helping others succeed as well and being up in front as a coach. I have also been able to meet with a couple of younger girls at my church a couple of times and we just formed a small ladies' Bible study group. Expressing myself through these blogs, thanks to the persistence of our daughter Katie, has also been a song in my heart that I can now voice.
Bouquet of Praise - picture 3. Corrie Ten Boom, known as a survivor of Nazi concentration camps where she witnessed her sister being killed, used to speak on forgiveness all around the world. She actually met the man who had murdered her sister. His life had changed and he was truly sorry and she was able to greet him. She would go home after her speeches, get on her knees and offer a bouquet of praise in thanks to the Lord. I do praise God for opportunities that are opened to me - even that I am trusted with a key to the Weight Watchers' meeting places:). In the Bible, we are called the "aroma of Christ" as well. That is what I want my life to be! I am stressed as I sometimes have to pull up by boot straps in new situations and find where I fit. When I choose to find those places, I am blessed.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Criticism: Take it with a Grain of Salt?
If you are able to take criticism with a grain of salt, you are definitely a more mature person than me.
Recently, I had some criticism directed at me and it was given anonymously, which I consider low and somewhat cowardly. Anyway, my first response was to be tearful, defensive and just basically upset. I wanted to give up on the venture though I am not a quitter by nature. I hardly even wanted to talk about it. People who know me know that things are serious when I am too quiet:). I also basically feel I am getting a little too old to be in training of any sort - or to spend my life trying to please everyone. I vented to Tom and a couple of people and asked for prayer.
The Bible says a wise person is willing to learn. A fool is not.
So...I sifted through the comments and realized there was some truth in parts of it. I didn't think it was characteristic of me for the most part but saw how it could be perceived that way based on the situation in which the person viewed me. So I resolved to do better. I purposely made some changes and think I am improving.
So I have not totally grown up yet. Who has?
It would be so much better if as a rule, people would come to each other once they calm down and say things in a helpful, loving way. I am not always capable of doing that either. So in the meantime: Take the criticism. Process. Learn and hopefully forgive and move on. Not quite a grain of salt but progress anyway.
Recently, I had some criticism directed at me and it was given anonymously, which I consider low and somewhat cowardly. Anyway, my first response was to be tearful, defensive and just basically upset. I wanted to give up on the venture though I am not a quitter by nature. I hardly even wanted to talk about it. People who know me know that things are serious when I am too quiet:). I also basically feel I am getting a little too old to be in training of any sort - or to spend my life trying to please everyone. I vented to Tom and a couple of people and asked for prayer.
The Bible says a wise person is willing to learn. A fool is not.
So...I sifted through the comments and realized there was some truth in parts of it. I didn't think it was characteristic of me for the most part but saw how it could be perceived that way based on the situation in which the person viewed me. So I resolved to do better. I purposely made some changes and think I am improving.
So I have not totally grown up yet. Who has?
It would be so much better if as a rule, people would come to each other once they calm down and say things in a helpful, loving way. I am not always capable of doing that either. So in the meantime: Take the criticism. Process. Learn and hopefully forgive and move on. Not quite a grain of salt but progress anyway.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Surviving the Storms: Real Ones
We were watching "Storm Stories" tonight and pictures were shown of the mobile home park in Andover, Kansas in the 90's when we lived in the area. We didn't live in the park but two ladies, Betty and ?, walked out of their homes with the clothes on their backs. That was the last they would see of their homes and their possessions. It was especially sad for Betty because she was a great seamstress and made all of her own things so they were really irreplaceable. They were from our church and walked over to other friends from the church. While they all sat in the basement of that home, the Mendoza's home above the basement was also carried away.
They were all thankful to be safe but 19 people did lose their lives.
Even though the tornado touched down within a mile or two of us, our main remembrance of it is crouching down under the couch in the basement of our tri-level house with our young kids at the time, wondering if we were better off there or under the shelf in the toy closet of the basement.
We weren't quite as fortunate when the hailstorm hit the Chilton to Manitowac area. Katie was returning from her Spring semester from college. She came home to see a home that looked like it had been fired upon by a BB gun all across the front. Our bay window and roof were destroyed and glass shattered throughout the house from all of our front windows. The roof was also shot (but we were going to need one soon anyway).
I was working at school about a half hour away when the sky got very dark and the storm hit. Tom and our little black Cocker, Sadie, headed to the basement. Sadie ran back up but Tom knew not to go up after her (She was fine.). I happened to be subbing for another teacher that afternoon when Tom called. I headed home as soon as possible but it took more than an hour as the police were keeping traffic to a minimum in the area.
A lot of people needed repairs but no one was hurt. Tom called Bob Berres, our friend in construction, right away which put us to the front of the list for repairs. Our insurance company was great, covering our damages well, even replacing the dining room floor, which had hidden glass that came to the surface and ruined it months later. Our friends from Kansas had given us a special clock when we moved to Wisconsin, and it hung without breaking in our living room where everything else had shattered, so we all thought that was great.
So we survived just fine. I think those were a lot easier than some of the emotional ones we have somehow endured:).
They were all thankful to be safe but 19 people did lose their lives.
Even though the tornado touched down within a mile or two of us, our main remembrance of it is crouching down under the couch in the basement of our tri-level house with our young kids at the time, wondering if we were better off there or under the shelf in the toy closet of the basement.
We weren't quite as fortunate when the hailstorm hit the Chilton to Manitowac area. Katie was returning from her Spring semester from college. She came home to see a home that looked like it had been fired upon by a BB gun all across the front. Our bay window and roof were destroyed and glass shattered throughout the house from all of our front windows. The roof was also shot (but we were going to need one soon anyway).
I was working at school about a half hour away when the sky got very dark and the storm hit. Tom and our little black Cocker, Sadie, headed to the basement. Sadie ran back up but Tom knew not to go up after her (She was fine.). I happened to be subbing for another teacher that afternoon when Tom called. I headed home as soon as possible but it took more than an hour as the police were keeping traffic to a minimum in the area.
A lot of people needed repairs but no one was hurt. Tom called Bob Berres, our friend in construction, right away which put us to the front of the list for repairs. Our insurance company was great, covering our damages well, even replacing the dining room floor, which had hidden glass that came to the surface and ruined it months later. Our friends from Kansas had given us a special clock when we moved to Wisconsin, and it hung without breaking in our living room where everything else had shattered, so we all thought that was great.
So we survived just fine. I think those were a lot easier than some of the emotional ones we have somehow endured:).
Thursday, December 30, 2010
2010: Finishing 'er Up
So many changes in our lives this last year and we are about to enter another year with some uncertainties as is common to all of us. We have had job changes, a location change, and friendship adjustments and additions.
As most of you know, we left St.Marys, PA around mid year. Tom was a census crew leader after finishing up at with his pastoral position there. We had a few months before he started his chaplaincy residency position here. It was a rough move for me, even though I looked forward to being nearer to our son and family and friends.
I knew I would need to make new friends, and thankfully, as this year comes to a close, I know I have made several.
It's nice to be back in Wisconsin and we had a better than average summer and fall, butwith winter upon us again, we are sorely tempted to move south and west when Tom completes his residency. But I cannot bear to think of starting afresh again, so I will table that thought for now.
After some time, we have found a couple of small groups to be in, some volunteer opportunities and of course, I have found a part time job with Weight Watchers, and am beginning to develop some fun friendships there. Tom has been enjoying his work as a chaplain and there seems to be a good spirit among his team. We also had some outgoing next door neighbors, who welcomed us enthusiastically. They have bought a home not far from here but we miss seeing them regularly. And then there's our sometimes calm/sometimes feisty Shih-tzu Sasha, who I teasingly say was my only friend besides Tom in the immediate area when we moved here. We have also been able to stay in touch with friends throughout Wisconsin, family not too far away, and keep communication going through facebook and some phone calls to and from PA.
So we have just about made it through another year. I have said before that even though we have made a number of moves and we don't understand the how's and why's of some of them, I have always sensed that we have been and are where we are supposed to be - and I am thankful for the friends whe have made at each place we have lived. Now, as the year 2010 ends, I can truthfully say that is true for us here in the La Crosse area too.
As most of you know, we left St.Marys, PA around mid year. Tom was a census crew leader after finishing up at with his pastoral position there. We had a few months before he started his chaplaincy residency position here. It was a rough move for me, even though I looked forward to being nearer to our son and family and friends.
I knew I would need to make new friends, and thankfully, as this year comes to a close, I know I have made several.
It's nice to be back in Wisconsin and we had a better than average summer and fall, butwith winter upon us again, we are sorely tempted to move south and west when Tom completes his residency. But I cannot bear to think of starting afresh again, so I will table that thought for now.
After some time, we have found a couple of small groups to be in, some volunteer opportunities and of course, I have found a part time job with Weight Watchers, and am beginning to develop some fun friendships there. Tom has been enjoying his work as a chaplain and there seems to be a good spirit among his team. We also had some outgoing next door neighbors, who welcomed us enthusiastically. They have bought a home not far from here but we miss seeing them regularly. And then there's our sometimes calm/sometimes feisty Shih-tzu Sasha, who I teasingly say was my only friend besides Tom in the immediate area when we moved here. We have also been able to stay in touch with friends throughout Wisconsin, family not too far away, and keep communication going through facebook and some phone calls to and from PA.
So we have just about made it through another year. I have said before that even though we have made a number of moves and we don't understand the how's and why's of some of them, I have always sensed that we have been and are where we are supposed to be - and I am thankful for the friends whe have made at each place we have lived. Now, as the year 2010 ends, I can truthfully say that is true for us here in the La Crosse area too.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Flipping Over: Black Ice
As I skid to a stop or around the corner because of our recent snowstorm, I am reminded of what started out as a peaceful ride to work several years ago.
I was commuting from Chilton to Plymouth, Wisconsin to teach at St. John's Lutheran School there. We had a staff meeting that day so I was headed in a little earlier than usual. When I came to the stop in Kiel, about half way, in my "93 blue gray Taurus, I remember being thankful that it had been a fairly calm winter. Little did I know...
Ten or fifteen minutes later, I was turning the last little curve on my way to school. A car or two passed facing me. Within a few seconds, my car slipped over the yellow line. As I did what I could to maneuver it back to my side of the road, I saw a post and hoped I wouldn't hit it.
The next thing I knew I was upside down in my car off the road to the side. I later found out that I hit that pole but it wasn't a very sturdy one. Cell phones were more scarce then but I had one because of this very thing. However, our daughter Katie was home from college and I had left it with her that day. (I know. It figures:). I realized the radio was still on so I quickly thought that the horn must work too so I pressed it.
A very nice lady, also a teacher at a nearby public school, came to my aid. She called my school to tell them what happened and the ambulance/police.
The seat belt felt tight on my stomach so I asked if I should release it. Definitely not!
Help came before long. I was able to push back my seat, release my belt and crawl out somehow. The passenger side of the car was caved in and the Taurus was totalled.
Guess what I thought of? Where were those loose dollars that had been on the top of my purse? Where was my other mitten?
The paramedics took my vitals - my blood pressure was high - and asked me where I wanted to be taken. Since I was just a couple of blocks from school, I suggested going there. I calmly called my husband who didn't think it was exactly a calm situation
My principal was a character - great sense of humor. When he saw me walk by with my book bag, now filled with a few remnants of glass from my windshield, he said he thought he was seeing an angel.
I taught that day. I teased my principal, saying he walked by once in awhile just to see if I was still standing. I mainly worked mornings so it wasn't a long day.
Tom picked me up later and we went to the junk yard to clear out my things - and to take a picture of me in front of the car. I doubt anyone would have survived in the passenger seat.
Since that time, I have been driving my '99 tan Escort which I hope to trade in for a blue gray Focus - probably when it dies.
I was commuting from Chilton to Plymouth, Wisconsin to teach at St. John's Lutheran School there. We had a staff meeting that day so I was headed in a little earlier than usual. When I came to the stop in Kiel, about half way, in my "93 blue gray Taurus, I remember being thankful that it had been a fairly calm winter. Little did I know...
Ten or fifteen minutes later, I was turning the last little curve on my way to school. A car or two passed facing me. Within a few seconds, my car slipped over the yellow line. As I did what I could to maneuver it back to my side of the road, I saw a post and hoped I wouldn't hit it.
The next thing I knew I was upside down in my car off the road to the side. I later found out that I hit that pole but it wasn't a very sturdy one. Cell phones were more scarce then but I had one because of this very thing. However, our daughter Katie was home from college and I had left it with her that day. (I know. It figures:). I realized the radio was still on so I quickly thought that the horn must work too so I pressed it.
A very nice lady, also a teacher at a nearby public school, came to my aid. She called my school to tell them what happened and the ambulance/police.
The seat belt felt tight on my stomach so I asked if I should release it. Definitely not!
Help came before long. I was able to push back my seat, release my belt and crawl out somehow. The passenger side of the car was caved in and the Taurus was totalled.
Guess what I thought of? Where were those loose dollars that had been on the top of my purse? Where was my other mitten?
The paramedics took my vitals - my blood pressure was high - and asked me where I wanted to be taken. Since I was just a couple of blocks from school, I suggested going there. I calmly called my husband who didn't think it was exactly a calm situation
My principal was a character - great sense of humor. When he saw me walk by with my book bag, now filled with a few remnants of glass from my windshield, he said he thought he was seeing an angel.
I taught that day. I teased my principal, saying he walked by once in awhile just to see if I was still standing. I mainly worked mornings so it wasn't a long day.
Tom picked me up later and we went to the junk yard to clear out my things - and to take a picture of me in front of the car. I doubt anyone would have survived in the passenger seat.
Since that time, I have been driving my '99 tan Escort which I hope to trade in for a blue gray Focus - probably when it dies.
Monday, December 13, 2010
Christmas: WHY?!!!
A friend (thanks Ruth) gave me a nudge last night to blog again. I have been busy, which is good and healthy for me, but have not had time or inspiration to blog. Here goes:
Why would Jesus come down to earth as a baby? I heard the illustration again recently of a boy who would have to be an ant to understand his beloved ant colony. Small in comparison but a thought. Why would he choose a humble birth - a homeless kind of setting? Why be born of a virgin and cause embarrassment to her betrothed?
Why grow up like us with temptations, human obstacles, betrayal, rejection and loneliness?
There were some good things about being here. He had some not so always faithful fishermen friends and a following of caring women who believed He was extraordinary.
He did some awesome miracles. By the way I like to reserve the word AWESOME for Him alone.) Why be so misunderstood to the point of death and crucifixion?
BECAUSE HE VALUED US!! He was willing and eager to do this all because a perfect sacrifice had to be given to satisfy His innate Holiness. No other animal or human could qualify. Only His blood sacrifice could pay for my sins and yours. Only His unconditional love could give us a glimpse of how much He cared! Mysterious (way beyond figuring out)! Incomprehensible! Somewhat Unbelievable (yet He allows us to choose to believe it and begin an intimate relationship with Him)!
The ultimate Creative act, but isn't that what we can and should expect from our awesome Creator!
Am I a spiritual giant who has figured this all out or who lives in the victory everyday as I realize the ramifications of this great love and this defining Life in history? Certainly not.
But I praise and glorify Him for doing it in spite of my normal human frailty. After all, He really does understand what it is like to be one of us.
Why would Jesus come down to earth as a baby? I heard the illustration again recently of a boy who would have to be an ant to understand his beloved ant colony. Small in comparison but a thought. Why would he choose a humble birth - a homeless kind of setting? Why be born of a virgin and cause embarrassment to her betrothed?
Why grow up like us with temptations, human obstacles, betrayal, rejection and loneliness?
There were some good things about being here. He had some not so always faithful fishermen friends and a following of caring women who believed He was extraordinary.
He did some awesome miracles. By the way I like to reserve the word AWESOME for Him alone.) Why be so misunderstood to the point of death and crucifixion?
BECAUSE HE VALUED US!! He was willing and eager to do this all because a perfect sacrifice had to be given to satisfy His innate Holiness. No other animal or human could qualify. Only His blood sacrifice could pay for my sins and yours. Only His unconditional love could give us a glimpse of how much He cared! Mysterious (way beyond figuring out)! Incomprehensible! Somewhat Unbelievable (yet He allows us to choose to believe it and begin an intimate relationship with Him)!
The ultimate Creative act, but isn't that what we can and should expect from our awesome Creator!
Am I a spiritual giant who has figured this all out or who lives in the victory everyday as I realize the ramifications of this great love and this defining Life in history? Certainly not.
But I praise and glorify Him for doing it in spite of my normal human frailty. After all, He really does understand what it is like to be one of us.
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